The Week in Review: October 13-October 17

I. The Spencers

A. Bobbie

On Monday, Tony's phone call from the stranger (Lorraine) continued; she told him to look close to home for someone who'd had a sonogram at Mercy.  He was noticeably thrown, and Amy noted his weirdness to Bobbie.  They chatted about Tony and then Amy moved on to Tony and Bobbie's marriage.  Bobbie didn't want to talk about it, but Amy reminded her that it would have been their anniversary.  She hadn't thought about it, and took that as a sign that she was moving on and feeling better.

Stefan interrupted, griping at Amy about something minor, and Bobbie told him to lay off.  She said that everyone was disgusted with him.  He stung her about her sympathizing with a woman scorned and turned away.  Tony came back up and told Amy to find someone to cover for him.  They both raised their eyebrows at that.

Later, Amy mentioned the anniversary again, and Bobbie blew it off.  But she remembered their wedding day...and last year, when she found Tony and Carly in bed together at the cabin (boy, do I want her to find out that Stefan set her up for that particular revelation).  Bobbie headed home from work after another exchange with Amy, announcing that she was going to ignore everything about Carly.  That didn't stop them from sniping about Carly's friendship with Lorraine....

Bobbie greeted Tony on her way out and she asked him when the baby was due.  January, he replied.

B. Luke and Katherine

Luke:  "You know, Miss Bell, for a woman who has experienced a sure as hell miracle cure you just don't seem as chipper as one might expect."
Katherine:  "Well I doubt that you of all people will improve my state of mind."
Luke:  "You know, just because Count Vlad took a big bite out of your marshmallow heart and spit it out on the grimy floorboards is no reason to take that out on innocent bystanders."

Luke:  "This is a man who supposedly is racked with guilt because he shot your pretty little butt.  Well that's progress.  At least you're not claiming you don't remember."

Luke:  "The only difference between this place and the Titanic is they had a band."
Katherine:  "Stefan has done a lot for this hospital."
Luke:  "Ya.  It's been stuff that if he hadn't created the crisis, wouldn't have needed to be done.  And it's just like you, cutie pie.  See, there he was at your hospital bed, laying on the oil, giving you the lies and the little trinkets and the ten thousand promises to speed your recovery when all the while he's the spud who put you there."

Luke:  "Ok.  Let me make it simple so you can understand.  He done you wrong, woman.  Why did he do that?"

Luke came on into the boardroom on Monday's episode (day 7 of 7) and Katherine wanted to know why he was there.  She told him she wanted nothing to do with him, but he wasn't so easily dissuaded.  He knew all about the board meeting, and he played on the feelings he knew she was having about Stefan.  He recounted the meeting, her shooting, and her months in a wheelchair.  He egged her on, playing on her humiliation and her pride.  He recounted his version of the history of Stefan's hospital takeover; she moved to defend him, but Luke had an answer for that as well.  He spun some conspiracy theory--with Stefan as the sole conspirator.  But in the end, she listened as he asked her to admit Stefan shot her.

Katherine:  "I'm not quite the dim bulb that you think I am."

Luke:  "Oh, Katie!  Hold on; I'll walk you to your car!"

At this point, Katherine told him that it would take more than her admission.  It would take evidence, and the gun was gone.  Now, what in sweet heaven's name does that have to do with anything?  Stefan's fingerprints weren't on it; it only served as evidence against Luke.  Sure, there are reasons Stefan might want it, but it proves nothing.  The writing on this thing gets worse and worse, and I'm praying they throw it over as quickly as they did the computer takeover storyline and get back to a more personal Timoria.  But Luke wasn't swayed; he was still determined, and he still wanted her help.

Luke:  "I know him.  I know everything about him.  I know his every move.  I know his every word.  I know his ever self-aggrandizing gesture."

Moments like this remind me of how much potential this storyline had (has?) before it got destroyed.  Luke's flaw is his blindness about Stefan.  He believes he knows everything about the man--and so far, he has.  He knows things he shouldn't get to know, things we don't get to see him learn.  The writing has him moving through Cassadine territory knowing everything.  And half the fun of the fight is seeing Luke struggle.  Back when the Cassadines first came to PC, people complained about Luke's rantings, but at least then he didn't have all the answers.  Stefan had an advantage where information was concerned, while Luke had the advantage of Laura and his home turf.  Now, Stefan has been watered down so much that it's too easy for Luke.  Which means it's not as fun to watch.  Statements like this should point to a classical fatal flaw in Luke Spencer, but all the point to is the way the writing has become so simplistic.  Statements like this should carry great dramatic irony.  Instead, they just state the obvious and move on.

People have complained, and rightfully so, that Luke has become a bit one-note in the past months.  I agree.  As much as I enjoy seeing Geary put Luke through *any* paces, I long for some of that Luke-ish complexity.  Just as I complained about the writing for Stefan when we started only getting one of his sides at a time, I'm going to have to complain about the writing for Luke as well.  We have had nice moments with Bobbie thrown in along the way, but they're becoming too few and far between.  I'm not saying Luke's not any good without Laura.  On the contrary.  He has family in town--Bobbie, Tony, Lucky, Amy, and Ruby.  He has a club to run and we haven't even seen him in it since he's been back.  Give him more scenes with Jason.  Give him more to do than worry about the teenyboppers (I'm thankful that we've only seen one mention of that, however).  Give him a scene where he sits quietly missing his wife and daughter before he's interrupted and has to get back into gear again.  Let him have a scene with Brenda, for Pete's sake.  Anything.  I'm still enchanted, but I also know how much better it can be.

Katherine:  "Would you stop stalking me please?"
Luke:  "I'm not stalking you, Katherine.  I'm trying to give you back some of your self-respect.  Could I just, uh, get those for you?  You know, it really pains me to see a woman of your dignity and beauty skulking out of here like this."
Katherine:  "I'm not skulking."

Luke:  "You can't tell me that wasn't a rush.  He hates me...you know?  With a bone-chilling passion.  Think of the possibilities, Miss Bell.  Think of the possibilities."

But back to the story.  Luke found Katherine hauling some boxes out of her office and offered to help her out to her car so he could continue their chat.  She knew she couldn't say know, and she agreed.  As Luke punched the elevator button and held the boxes, the doors came open and they faced Stefan and Alexis.  Katherine thanked him for his help as they passed by.  The looks on everyone's faces were fantastic.  And Luke had won his point.  Katherine would listen.

C. Luke and Jason

Luke:  "How long have we been partners, and how long do you expect us to be?"

Luke:  "Claude thinks people miss me.  That's heartwarming."

On Tuesday (day 8 of 8), Luke showed up at The Outback to meet Jason, saying he wasn't sure he wanted Jason around his club.  Jason filled him in--he'd been taking care of the club while he was away.  Luke asked about Sonny; Jason told him Sonny wasn't coming back.  Luke was stunned, but unlike everyone else, didn't push for answers, quickly realizing that Jason would tell him nothing.  It was clear he was still wondering about the reasons why, but he settled for talking club business at this point.  But club business also meant Sonny's ex-other-business.  Luke wanted to know what Jason's control would mean to his club.

Jason:  "Do you want me out of the club."
Luke:  "Is that an option?"

Luke:  "They're gonna be comin' out of the woodwork to take you out.  I wouldn't be surprised if you ain't dead within six months.  Be that as it may, no matter what there's gonna be body bags."

Jason said he would get out if that were the only way to keep Luke away from the other business.  Luke didn't have the cash to buy Sonny's stock and didn't want another partner like Lucy (*pout*).  But he also knew Jason would be fighting for his life in the near future.  He recounted the situation quickly and correctly.  He knew Jason had been trained by the best, but two years wasn't very much experience.  He would help Jason out, but he would not get involved in the war.

At this point, Jason told him he should leave...because of the man who had just entered.  Jason said the guy had been tailing him for a couple of days and asked Luke to get a drink at the bar while he dealt with things.  Luke offered backup; Jason said he didn't need it.

Luke:  "Ah, who cares what Brenda knows."
Jason:  "Sonny."

Luke:  "Jason, there's a world of difference between good intentions and the grim realities.  So why don't we leave it like this.  You do what you have to do.  Let me take care of my interests."
Jason:  "As long as you do the same."
Luke:  "It's your life, my boy.  Live it as you will and die as you must."

Luke returned to the table after the guy left and Jason filled him in.  Jason vowed again that he would do everything that could to keep things away from the club--but he couldn't make any promises.  Luke told him to keep the bullets away from his son.  Jason said he'd listen to his advice, maybe even take it, but that he wouldn't let anything touch Luke and his family.  He'd promised Sonny.  Luke knew he meant it, but also knew that he wasn't in a position to promise, given the circumstances.

Luke:  "You pulled a gun on Alan?"

After the scene with Alan, Luke was the only one who stayed to ask for an explanation...and he was highly entertained.  Jason smiled too, at retelling the story.  Luke observed that Alan might not have been upset when it happened because he could blame it on Sonny, but now Alan had to face the fact that Jason was acting on his own.  Jason said he'd stop by the club in the near future and Luke stayed behind to talk to Mac.  He mentioned Robin; Jason said it was her birthday the day before.  Luke asked if he had spoken to her; Jason replied no.  Luke changed the subject.  I love these two together.  Luke always knows what not to ask and Jason knows the score as well.  I hope for more scenes with the two of them as time wears on.  They'll both be missing Sonny, both personally and professionally, and I think we should get to see them deal with that a bit together.

D. Luke and Bobbie

Luke:  "Hold it.  I wanna ask you something."
Lucky:  "What?"
Luke:  "Sit down and I'll think of it."
Lucky:  "How 'bout later, ok?"
Luke:  "Later's good."

Luke:  "God, people can be so rude."

On Wednesday (day 9 of 9), Luke came home to find Lucky headed out again.  Bobbie commented on his quick escape, and reminded that Lucas was taking Skillethead...er...Foster to school for show and tell.  Luke fed the dog something that looked like Cheerios while Bobbie related the plan for the demonstration.  Then Bobbie told him she'd had a bad day because everyone wanted to tell her about Carly and Tony.  Bobbie said that she was happy Tony was moving on, except for the Carly part, and Luke told her to forget about Carly.  She changed the subject and Luke told her that he'd spoken to his "little Swiss Miss" and she was worried about Lucky and Sarah because of Sarah's current connection to the Cassadines.

Luke:  "Oh Barbara, life is so weird.  I didn't understand teenage romance when I was a teenager.  I mean, I never saw the point in it.  Such a grimy, little, sweaty back seat, isn't it?  I always considered myself very lucky to have grown up at Ruby's.  I didn't have to confuse sex with romance.  There was always a...door to knock on.  Remember Molly?  Anyway, I didn't have to deal with that kid stuff."
Bobbie:  "Ya.  So right now you're being punished?"
Luke:  "I guess everything good comes at a price."

Now, throughout this next scene, Luke and Bobbie had some lunch.  There was a large debate about whether this was lunch or breakfast, but because of Bobbie's comment that Lucky had only been their for four minutes, I assumed he'd come home for lunch and that Luke had just come back from seeing Jason at The Outback (but I don't have the video up to check the outfit).  Anyway, Luke made PB&J sandwiches (Jackie Zeman nibbled at the crust, dodging the PB), poured milk for her, took beer for himself, and moved on to the chocolate cake (eaten with his hands).  The comments on this meal on ratsa were a hoot, but paved the way for one of the snarkiest Luke threads in a while.  Sigh.

Anyway, Luke talked about growing up at Ruby's and never having to worry about teenage romance--yet another reason for Laura to come home.  Of course, she didn't have your typical teenage romances either, now, did she?  Ha!  But I like the promise of more from Luke about Lucky's love life (so to speak), because I think it would provide a nice subject matter for Luke to realize that he's got some things to learn about life, love, and parenting.  I'm crossing my fingers....  And Luke coined the phrase for the teenybopper storyline: "this Webber triangular thing."  I'm calling it the WTT.  ;)

Luke:  "Barbara, because dragging my kid out of the middle of this train wreck could very well involve agitating the least charming of your ex-husbands."

Luke:  "But mistakes are made when emotions run high."
Bobbie:  "Well, I mean, I'll admit I would like to see Stefan hanging by his chest hairs and have everybody in Port Charles use his behind as a pinata."
Luke:  "That's good!"
Bobbie:  "But that doesn't mean I'm mad."

Luke:  "Ya, like the time you broke into his computer and I acted like such an idiot in the hall to distract him."

Bobbie:  "If you've got something, Luke, then tell me.  But I don't wanna work off some hunch you had in the shower."

Bobbie:  "This isn't just about teenage romance, is it?"
Luke:  "They said that you were just another pretty nurse."

Bobbie said she'd help him with Lucky because they made a good team.  The super siblings ride again!  Actually, Luke didn't accept her help at first.  He didn't want her to go into Stefan's path again.  They reminisced about their recent excursions against Stefan and she convinced him to let her help him.  But this scene made me cringe, because it suggested that Luke's next move would be to keep Stefan distracted while the kids worked out things amongst themselves.  I don't buy that motive, and I wouldn't buy that storyline.  Luke has better things to go after Stefan about.  Lucky for Lucky that's the last we've heard of it.  Ick.  But at this point, Luke headed off after Blondie....

E. Luke and Katherine

Katherine:  "Who is it?"
Luke:  "Open up Miss Bell.  You've won the retribution sweepstakes!  This win entitles you to one coupon good for kickin' a Cassadine where the sun don't shine!"

Luke:  "So.  If you want to get to the truth?  I'm your ride."

Luke:  "Anything's possible in my world."

Luke bellowed the above from out in the hall, and when Katherine let him in on Thursday (day 10 of 10) he was almost giddy with anticipation at the look on Stefan's face when he saw them together again and again.  She tried to brush him off, but he made her visualize the scene at the elevator and announced that he was her way to the truth.  He told her that he could get the gun back because Stefan would have kept it because it was Luke's--so he'd have something to use against Luke later.  Katie was skeptical, both about the gun and about their taunting Stefan by being together.  But Luke demanded to know if she'd press charges if he found the gun.

Katherine:  "Revenge is never a good thing."
Luke:  "Oh, I don't know.  It feels pretty good."

Luke:  "But how about this?  You put all your...your eggs into one basket and then that basket turns into a bucket of slop.  Don't you wanna know why?"

Katherine said that she wanted to move on and that just because she and Stefan were through that didn't mean that she was automatically in cahoots with Luke to bring him down.  Luke reminded her that she was ready to go to the police until the evidence went missing.  Katherine actually announced that revenge wasn't a good thing, but Luke taunted her with the opportunity to find the truth about Stefan.  He told her that Stefan wasn't through hurting people and asked her to go out with him for a few drinks and they'd discuss it.  She said that he could buy her dinner and they could talk.

Katherine:  "This was a big mistake.  Did you know that they were here?"
Luke:  "No little lady, this is luck!  Sheer luck!"

When they got to The Outback, Luke was thrilled and Katherine dismayed that Stefan and Alexis were there.  She wanted to leave but he made her stay.  In the meantime, Alexis told Stefan to ignore them but Stefan brushed her warnings aside.  Luke left for the men's room, telling Katie that Stefan would be at her table before the door closed behind him.  He was right, of course, but even I could have told you that.

Stefan:  "What do you think you're doing?"
Katherine:  "Driving you nuts, obviously.  How does it feel?"
Stefan:  "You're using very poor judgment joining forces with that man."
Katherine:  "Is that what I'm doing?  Joining forces?  Ooo, it sounds so impressive."

Stefan:  "He will leave you stranded when he has no further use for you."
Katherine:  "And that sounds familiar, doesn't it."

Stefan warned her not to join up with Luke, saying that Luke would only use her and she would only get hurt.  She managed to put away that weird nervousness about seeing him and get in some good hits of her own.

Luke:  "Nothing I like better than being argued over."

Luke:  "We seem to have left what's-his-name speechless.  Don't you think that Katie is even more scrumptious standing up on her legs than she was rolling around in that metal basket you stuck her in?"

Katherine:  "Do you want to know what he really said to me when he came over?"
Luke:  "No, let me tell you.  He said I'm the big bad wolf, he's grandma, and you'd better watch your cookies in the woods."

Katherine:  "Let's let the using begin."

Luke returned and let the verbiage fly.  Stefan silently went away.  I miss the battles of words between Luke and Stefan, but at the same time I think it says a lot about Stefan that he won't engage anymore.  He seems less confident and almost vulnerable.  And I suspected that he would start trying to make up for that feeling in the near future.  Katherine chided Luke for his remark about her (above), but he told her that they were trying to drive Stefan to snap.  Katherine started to tell him what Stefan had said, but Luke knew already.  Some people comment on the fact that Luke knows everything, but this whole scene seemed like something Foster could have predicted.  Kat and Luke began to acknowledge that they were using each other, but she didn't seem to be interested in stopping.  On the contrary.  She announced that she was ready to let their partnership and their plan begin.

Luke:  "Well, I'd say our first venture into the theatrical was a smashing success, wouldn't you?"
Katherine:  "How do you figure?  All the audience did was walk out."
Luke:  "No, my darlin', the audience didn't walk out.  They stormed; they seethed.  Stefan's nostrils were flared wide enough to park Buicks."
Katherine:  "And that's a good thing?"
Luke:  "Don't tell me when your little bouncy heart has been dribbled all over the court that it doesn't feel good every once in a while to slam dunk one."
Katherine:  "Oh, shut up.  You don't give a damn about me.  All you want to do is irritate Stefan."
Luke:  "Well what do you want me to do?  Hold your hand and gaze vacantly into your baby blues?  Of course I want to irritate Stefan.  I'm like a rash he can't get rid of."

Luke:  "It's about control, Blondie.  Try to follow.  We wanna make him lose his, right?  Nothing makes him lose it like this irritating rash he can't get rid of.  Now what's gonna happen next is he's gonna come to you.  And he's gonna try to reclaim your color coordinated plastic little heart."

On Friday (day 11 of 11), Luke congratulated himself as the enemy left the restaurant.  Katherine didn't seem to understand that this was the goal of the performance--to irritated Stefan into making a wrong move (not Luke's greatest plan, but still).  It was as if she expected him to pronounce his love from her right then and there.  Sigh.  But I've decided to use Luke's dialogue as an example of figurative language in my next class....

Katherine:  "You're lying."
Luke:  "Now see, if you'd have said that to him a few times along the way you wouldn't have to sit here and have this irritating conversation with me."

Katherine:  "You don't even know where the gun is."
Luke:  "Oh gee, let's see.  Who could have it?  The butcher, the baker, or the paralysis maker?"
Katherine:  "What are you gonna do, break into Wyndemere and search his office?"
Luke:  "Well, actually, I thought I might start by strip searching his cousin."
Katherine:  "You are sick.  And I will not be an accomplice to that."
Luke:  "No?  And I was hoping you'd hold her down."

Luke told her what to expect next, and to listen closely when Stefan came to talk to her next because he would be speaking something near to the truth.  Katherine was frustrated with Luke at this time, probably because Stefan wasn't there to be frustrated with.  She ranted about what Luke wanted out of this deal like she was shocked to find out that they didn't want the same things.  Sigh again.  She stormed out, but Luke knew she would be back.

F. Luke and Alexis

After Stefan left, Alexis called Ned and left an unintentionally suggestive note on his voice mail.  She was embarrassed and tried to explain her way out of it.  Too cute.  But they're sure pushing this Alexis-loves-Ned routine a bit far for me.

Luke:  "You've been busy while I was away, haven't ya."
Alexis:  "Is that what Katherine says?"
Luke:  "'Smatter, forget your listening devices?"
Alexis:  "I think it's commendable.  I do.  It shows your good heart that you've taken her under your wing.  And she does seem happiest when someone's feeling sorry for her."
Luke:  "Hmmm.  But I think she had someone shorter and darker in mind.  Taste."
Alexis:  "You can turn her head.  Isn't that what that display was all about?  You know, I think that you should have an affair with her.  I think that it would do her a world of good.  Now, Laura may not like it, but if it annoys Stefan then it's all for a good cause, isn't it?"
Luke:  "Um-hmm.  But then again, if I started sleeping with every woman he shortchanged, how busy would I be?  And who's at the top of that list?"
Alexis:  "Is that an invitation?"
Luke:  "If only, huh?  But last time I looked, hey, I'm married.  Very married.  And I think I told you once that Laura has ruined me for ordinary women."
Alexis:  "What makes you think that I'm an ordinary woman?"
Luke:  "Just testing your reflexes.  You're a fascinating woman.  I'll tell you that.  How do you take it?  This present situation, I mean.  You know, Dip-wad says 'jump' and you say 'off which cliff'?  You're smarter than he is.  You're a Cassadine through and through.  You're more efficient.  It must be really hard.  Why are you not the general in this international war effort?  Why are you a lowly foot soldier?"
Alexis:  "If you want to play with someone's head I suggest you stick to the one with more air in it.  But I see that Katherine's walked out on you."
Luke:  "Yes, but it's that woman scorned thing, you know.  In fact, I would warn my cousin if I were you that the blonde bombshell is ticking."
Alexis:  "And if she blows up?"
Luke:  "This time somebody else might get paralyzed."

Luke came to the table and took her mind off of Ned, though.  Alexis mocked his involvement with Katherine and his petty desire to irritate Stefan and they launched into one of their fabulous conversations where they actually swapped bits and pieces of information in the middle of all their baiting and biting.  I got carried away with this one--it was too hard to edit--so you can see the whole first segment of their conversation above.  The things that struck me were Alexis' flirting back--she has, lately, stopped doing that and just been irritated with Luke and this time she played along--and the fact that she makes no bones about badmouthing Katherine anymore.  That's actually confirming some of the information that Katherine thinks she has (and now Luke thinks he has).  This is one of the chief ways Luke knows things, I think.  He has these seemingly taunting and pointless conversations with people but can read them really well.

Luke:  "Threat?  Who said anything about a threat?"
Alexis:  "You suggested you may lob an exploding blonde our way."

Luke:  "Do you ever notice how you can't have a conversation without using the first person plural?"

Luke:  "You're not that united we stand divided we fall kind of person that you try to make people think you are."

Luke does grammar as well as figurative language!

Luke turned around and poked at Alexis' familial relationships.  He asked her how she could stand to be a lackey and said that she held on, playing nice, hoping that things wouldn't fall apart around her.  That's pretty astute, actually.

Luke:  "Take that blonde that just swiveled her way out of here.  You can't stand her."
Alexis:  "Neither can you.  For that matter, neither can Stefan.  And aren't we the in-crowd."
Luke:  "Ya.  How did that happen?"

Luke:  "Your cousin never surprises me.  But you do.  How do I reconcile that?"

And Luke continued to come back to serious questions in the midst of the flying words.  Alexis refused to answer, but it was clear that she was upset and admitted that she had given more than she got.  She didn't know what he wanted, but she wanted him to go away.  But again she had told him more than she meant to, and he picked up on it.  He likes her--respects her, at least--and at this point I can't tell whether I'd rather have Alexis in an uneasy partnership with Luke (I know I'd rather have that than Katherine--am I in the in-crowd or what?) or see the two of them go head to head without Stefan as the middleman.  And what I resent more than anything is that this storyline has just made me use the word "middleman" to describe our Stefan.  Ick and double ick.

Alexis received a call that Stefan hadn't gone home, and I wondered if this was the whole reason Luke was hanging around: to make sure he was right about Stefan's next move and that Alexis was away...

Luke:  "What a nice night for a reunion with my old gun."

Alexis:  "Oh dear.  Not those binoculars again."
Luke:  "Don't you have papers to sign?"
Alexis:  "I majored in signing.  I'm very fast."

...so he could go out to Wyndemere, of course.  It was so nice to see Luke back out there with his binoculars, casing Wyndemere.  He thought he had the timing down, but Alexis showed up.

II. Carly and AJ

A. Carly and AJ

Carly and AJ were still stuck in the closet on Monday.  She ranted but he remained calm.  When she calmed down she fell into apologizing for the door closing and everything else.  At first he wouldn't speak to her, which infuriated her.  They talked about his promise to her, and he told her that it might have been more about him than about her baby.  She didn't understand what he meant at first, but he told her about his family--about Alan--and why he wanted Tony to always be sure that this was his child.  Carly really felt for him and went off talking about children not being wanted; she told AJ she had a best friend who was adopted.

Carly said it had, for a moment, felt like they had been friends again.  She wanted to move forward; he told her that they weren't going anywhere.  She wants him to forgive and forget because it'll be better for her, but she has yet to understand the depth of the pain she's caused him.  At this point, Keesha showed up and let them out.  She was not amused at their story or at Carly's passive-aggressive/self-denigrating comments.  She and AJ headed off; she was snippy with AJ, actually, for some unknown reason.

B. Tony and Carly

After the call at the hospital, Tony went home and started going through the desk to find any evidence of Carly's alleged sonogram.  Carly arrived home, rambling on about his being worried, and he stopped her cold by asking her if she had a sonogram at Mercy.  Fortunately for her, his beeper went off at that point and he had to go back to the hospital, giving her some time to formulate an answer.

Carly:  "God, why is it so easy for you to always just assume the first thing that some anonymous caller has to say about me?"

She called the nurses' station frantically, and Amy made it clear that this wasn't the first time Carly had called.  Tony was in a seven-hour surgery--he had volunteered for it, wanting not to go home, I suppose.  He showed up as she was phoning Lorraine and she hung up and tried to get him to rest, but he asked her the question again.  He told her about the phone call and Carly was appalled that he was asking her this question based on the word of some strange phone call.  Tony said that she worked on impulse, and he was afraid that there was something wrong with the baby and she had a sonogram without telling him because she wanted to know without worrying him.

She thought that was the end of things, but Tony was still suspicious about that phone call.  And as he chided her about getting more sleep, he realized that it was Lorraine Miller who had made the call.  Carly tied this epiphany into Lorraine's weird behavior when she was there and spun it into a picture of a vengeful ex-friend who was trying to get back at her.  Tony bought it, but he wanted her to trust him with these stories.  He headed off to the shower and then back to work, while Carly left the apartment.

C. Carly

Carly:  "You've been playin' phone tag with all the wrong people."

Carly made another Uncle Luke-ish entrance and barreled down on Lorraine at Mercy about the phone call she'd made.  Lorraine said she wanted more money; Carly called her "sweetheart" and told her she'd take her down with her.  Lorraine called her "Snarly" and threw all of her problems in her face.  Carly left, not showing her worry until she was out the door.

III. Brenda and Jax

Monday found Brenda weeping in the park, having run out of the apartment after seeing one of V's drawings that reminded her of her wedding bouquet.  Jax came after her.  She spoke of the pain and of being alone.  But she was also mad at herself for feeling this way and for subjecting him to her emotions.  She was upset that he had to see her breaking down over Sonny; it wasn't fair to him, and it would hurt him.  He told her again that his emotions weren't the issue and that she could scream and cry and beat on him.  She refused at first, saying she should go to a therapist instead of using him like that.  He told her they'd find her a doctor, but insisted that she would stay with him.  I'm gonna spare you my rant about the way he handles her, because you've heard it lots of times before and you'll hear it again before too much longer.  Suffice it to say he's again telling her that he knows what's best for her better than she does.  Sigh.

Brenda:  "Do you know that I never have any idea how to thank you?"
Jax:  "Shut up and drink your hot chocolate."

Back at the penthouse, she mentioned the attic where she used to go; Jax finished the story about the Nancy Drew books for her.  Brenda reminisced a bit about her stingy sister (I was the same way about my books, especially after my sister trashed one accidentally).  She said that nobody ever missed her when she was up in the attic with those books, and that she always felt unwanted and alone.

On Tuesday, we opened with Jax in some antique shop, picking up something.  It would have been a better surprise if he'd just showed up with a box like he always does--pulling out a complete set and extra for this one scene sure seemed a long way to go for some filler.  Meanwhile, Brenda was at the penthouse listening to Mary Mae's CD.  Nice moment, and it was *wonderful* to hear Rosalind Cash singing again.  But the fact Brenda was listening to "Someone Who'll Watch Over Me" seemed sadly appropriate.

V:  "Most importantly, you have Jax."

V showed up to drop off messages before she took her afternoon off.  She identified Mary Mae and they chatted about L&B records a bit (Lois is back to being her nominal best friend, you'll be glad to know).  V talked about how glamorous and exciting that life must have been.  Brenda spoke of giving everything up; V told her she could start over.

Jax:  "Oh, did, uh, did Jerry call?"
V:  "Uh, no, not yet."
Jax:  "Listen, if he doesn't check in by tomorrow we're gonna have to hire someone to find him.  Ok?"
V:  "I'll put it on the calendar."
Jax:  "I'll remember."

Jax arrived at this point with a big box.  He and V shared the above exchange (too funny), and then Brenda cajoled him into giving her the box that she knew was for her.  It was a complete set of Nancy Drew.  Brenda launched into another tirade about Julia and her books--and the way their father had loved her best (and the story went on and on)--but Jax lightened the mood with a bet: that Brenda couldn't read one without skipping to the end.  Jax made sure she ate and then sent her to bed.  She said she would start her book and win their bet.  Jax made a phone call to someone, saying he had an idea about Brenda....

Brenda:  "Jax.  I know what I would say if I saw Sonny.  I would tell him that I wish I had never met him and that I hope that I never see him again."
Jax:  "Well, it might take saying something you've never said to him before."

On Friday, Jax admitted to Brenda that he was having someone delivered.  Brenda wasn't up for company, but Jax told her that it was someone she would want to see.  She immediately thought it was Sonny, but Jax reassured her that he knew better than that and that he would never bring Sonny back to her.  But he told her that she should know what she would say to Sonny for that day that he would show up. He wasn't impressed with her answer.  He went downstairs to get something to eat.

When he came back, she said that she thought she had stayed with him long enough and she thought she was going to go back to her hotel.  He chided her--actually chided her--for overreacting so to Sonny's name coming up and told her she was staying.  I absolutely HATE the way he's controlling her so passive aggressively, pretending he thinks she's strong while he insists on regulating her in the meantime.  This is even more screwed up than Brenda and Sonny, at this point.  But Brenda said again that she was going to be going through this for a while and not wanting Jax to have to watch.

But Jax insisted that he could see things she couldn't because he was an outsider.  He criticized her relationship with Sonny, saying that Sonny never wanted to be happy and never wanted her to be happy either.  This hacked me off too, because Jax never knew Sonny, and he has no way of knowing what Sonny wanted.  Sure I know why he thinks what he thinks.  But slamming Sonny seems to me to make Brenda seem that much stupider for staying with him.

Julia:  "Brenda, what would Daddy say, close your mouth before you catch flies.  So, you happy to see me?"

So Brenda stayed.  We had more talk about Julia and those damned Nancy Drew books.  A call came that the person was there and coming up and Jax looked really uncomfortable.  Brenda then asked if it was Robin or Lois, and Jax admitted that this might have been a mistake.  There was a knock on the door and Brenda opened it to find her sister Julia, happy to be there...and shut the door in the face of her above greeting and turned to face Jax.

IV. The Cassadines

Alexis:  "You really outdid yourself this time, Stefan."
Stefan:  "As you so often say yourself, when one is preserving the well-being of the family, no effort shall be spared.  Anything for the cause, right Alexis?"

On Monday, Alexis tried to get Stefan to eat, to go home and sleep, something.  But he was distant and resigned.  As she left him, Ned called her on the cell phone.  She mentioned ELQ's troubles to Stefan; they were apparently harsher than Stefan had made it seem.  He doesn't seem to suspect her in his Katherine troubles; I think that the above line (and the accompanying attitude towards her lately) was born out of some need to see her lose something for the family just as he has.  After all, she's becoming involved with someone who could potentially be harmful to Cassadine Incorporated (or whatever it's actually called), and she sees nothing wrong with that.

Alexis:  "You certainly do know how to work the system, don't you Stefan."
Stefan:  "Only when necessary."

On Wednesday, Alexis was on the phone with a lawyer confirming that the Cassadines were responsible for the troubles with ELQ as Stefan came home.  She told him that it had been a personal call.  Stefan said he was expecting a call from a councilman about putting up an addition to the gym at the high school...so Nik wouldn't be suspended again.  Sigh.  This is what the Cassadine power has come to?  Stefan pulling strings at the public school?  Lord help us.

As he left, she confronted him, asking him if he trusted her and demanding to know why he was trying to run her life by keeping Ned away from her in Jakarta.  What?  Since when was she so devoted to Ned?!  And since when did she make all of their business about her?!  At the same time, I think she's right about Stefan's motives here.  I think *he's* made this personal as well.  We haven't really seen any of his actions regarding ELQ before this point--none of his decision making.  This whole confrontation over ELQ/Ned was poorly conceived and not in character for either of them, really.  And as much as I enjoy having some strife between them and hope things come to a head (and as much as I relish the idea of a Cassadine/Quartermaine feud), this stinks.

Stefan:  "If you've found your heart's desire here in the hinterlands I'd like to know about it."
Alexis:  "Ned Ashton is far from my heart's desire."

Stefan:  "We are no longer children playing by the sea.  We don't take turns in our little wooden dinghy.  In this world, Alexis, I navigate, you row."
Alexis:  "I understand that you're hurt over what happened with Katherine.  But that is no reason to be that cruel to me."
Stefan:  "Katherine was a mistake from the beginning.  I let my emotions rule me and I paid dearly.  But it only hurts for a short while.  I suggest you be brave, Alexis."

Stefan reminded her that this was a global undertaking, not a personal thing.  She was enraged that he wasn't answering her question.  So he told her straight out that he didn't approve and she insisted that Ned was a friend and someone to relate to.  Stefan asked her if that was all.  She said it was, but that she was still upset about his attempt to control her personal life.  He again said that was preposterous.  Then she asked him to let Ned come home.  He said he was astounded and she announced that she would do it herself.  He put a stop to that in no uncertain terms.  She then said that he was being cruel to her because of his loss of Katherine.  He announced that Katherine had been an emotional mistake and gave her a warning.

Alexis:  "It is not like you to interfere in my personal life."
Stefan:  "Haven't you noticed?  Things change."

Alexis calmed a bit and told him she didn't want Ned to be an issue between them.  He agreed.  But Stefan still wanted her to stay away from Ned, and she didn't appreciate that.  I started wondering again why he was so against this.  Is it business?  Does he want her away from the "competition?"  Or is it personal?  Does he want her to lose something for the sake of the family as well?  The problem is, we've never seen his reasoning, and it makes the opinion seem arbitrary.  Shame on them.  Nothing Stefan does should be arbitrary.

Leo:  "It's time for you to think of yourself."
Alexis:  "Isn't that what I was doing?  Aren't the interests of this family the same as my own?  I just didn't count on losing my closest friend."

On Thursday, Alexis and Leo sat together at The Outback.  He swore his loyalty to her and reassured her over their latest plan.  She spoke of her motives, saying that Katherine was a threat to the family and to Stefan's best interests.  And at this moment, Stefan arrived.  He hadn't heard enough to know what had happened, but he was angry to find himself discussed in such a way.  After he left them, Leo asked her if she had any second thoughts and told her to put this behind her.  He told her to indulge herself, and she thanked him for his loyalty.

Stefan:  "Allow me to remind you of something you seem to have forgotten, Alexis.  You don't know what my feelings are about Katherine Bell or anything else, and I don't require the services of a nanny." 

She joined Stefan at his table and he blew off her apology, telling her that Ned was working to regain Jakarta and she should hope that they could still stop him.  They were interrupted by the appearance of Luke and Katherine.  On Friday, when Stefan returned to their table having confronted Katherine and been rebuked, Alexis called for the check and tried to get him out of the restaurant.  Stefan was rude to her--almost cruel.  This was one of those moments where I really hate the way he treats her.

But after he left the restaurant, Stefan did indeed go to Katherine's, just as Luke said he would.  Stefan wouldn't continue to have things out with Katherine in public, and she knows that, if she'd stop to think about it.  She was shocked when she answered the door, thinking it was Luke.  He warned her about Luke and she told him that if he really didn't care, she couldn't hurt him, even with Luke.

Stefan:  "What do you think you can possibly learn from Luke Spencer?  He knows nothing about me."
Katherine:  "Well that just makes him a member of a very large club, doesn't it."

Stefan:  "Desperation is tiresome.  And this is particularly unpleasant."
Katherine:  "You wanted to kiss me."
Stefan:  "You're an attractive woman, Katherine.  The same can be said for Barbara.  Or any number of others."

She asked why he was there, and flaunted the fact that she had gotten his attention--or rather, that Luke had.  He went on about danger, and she mocked him for his bravery in coming to see the same desperate woman.  She told him that he couldn't control his feelings for her and told him to prove he didn't want her by walking out the door.  He didn't.  Walk, that is.  So she kissed him.  He claimed he had no positive response and told her she was tedious and pathetic.  He launched into the litany of the Cassadine/Spencer feud.  She didn't buy it, and she told him she was holding a trump card.

V. Mac and Felicia

On Monday, Dara was performing at The Outback.  Keesha was there, waiting for AJ to arrive, but he was stuck in the closet.  We had some small talk with the Qs and with Mac and Felicia as Maxie tried to dodge going home to bed, as well as some talk between Dara, Mac, and Felicia.  At one point, Lonnie followed Maxie, after the statue, but a waiter blocked him.  Emily stopped by to see Keesha as she left and they talked about AJ not showing up.  Keesha was convinced there was something wrong and went off to find him.

On Wednesday, Felicia and Maxie came by The Outback on their way to Maxie's presentation.  Maxie was nervous and convinced she was going to fail.  Mac tried to talk her out of it and fed her ice cream, but she didn't buy it.  Then he told her that everyone around her believed in her and that knowing that should make her believe in herself.  She understood, and they headed off to the presentation.

Felicia:  "That the reason why children adore you so much is that you don't treat them like they're from a different species.  In fact, did you know that the fourth grade is your natural peer group?  You like the same things.  You like the same things.  You like the same books, the same movies."
Mac:  "Movies were made for nine-year-olds."
Felicia:  "You like to wear socks that don't match."
Mac:  "I do not."
Felicia:  "You like to get dirty.  You think all dogs are telepathic.  You don't like to get your hair cut and you like to walk around in your underwear."
Mac:  "Fourth graders don't have mortgages.  Fourth graders don't shave.  And fourth graders don't like sex.  So I rest my case."

On Friday, they returned.  Mac praised Maxie repeatedly and Felicia applauded her more reasonably.  When she went to the kitchen, Felicia reprimanded Mac for being so vocal at Maxie's presentation while giving him a backhanded compliment about his way with children.  They noted Katherine and Luke sitting together and I knew the sight irritated Mac, rescuer that he is.

Maxie came back and we had a scene with Mac and Felicia sparring that ended up with a bet that Mac could put the kids to bed faster than Felicia could close up.  I was hoping that we'd get a comic sequence the next week with Mac and children, but no such luck.  This was dropped; call it foreshadowing.

At one point, Felicia greeted Lonnie, who had his eye on the doll.  He'd been skulking about all week, but I had no interest in accounting all the times he showed up.

VI. The Quartermaines

A. Alan

Alan became really jumpy over news of a middle-of-the-night gunshot wound.  Bobbie knew he was thinking about Jason--had he shot or been shot.  I like having scenes with these two, and I'd like to think the helping could go both ways a bit more.  But Alan was off to lunch with Monica and an afternoon appointment, leaving Amy and Bobbie to worry about his weird behavior.

Monica:  "Maybe you should consider med school, hum?"
AJ:  "Not a chance.  You see, I plan to open a nation wide chain of workout centers."

At The Outback, Monica and AJ arrived.  He spoke of figuring out what he wanted to do with his life away from the family, while she insisted they would support him in almost anything if they knew the truth about his relapse.  AJ didn't want to talk about Alan, but Monica had invited both of them to lunch without telling the other one.  Unfortunately, when they entered, they realized Jason was there too.

Monica:  "For all we know that could be his accountant."
AJ:  "I don't think so."

Alan:  "At least you...your brother here, he has the courtesy of dying slowly.  You're just walking around waiting for yourself to get shot, aren't ya."

They sat down; Alan was late.  Monica asked if they should invite Jason to join them, but AJ said it was clear Jason was busy.  As the thug left, Alan entered.  He was irritated that Monica had set up this lunch without informing him, and he calmly announced his position and left them.  He stopped at Jason's table, asking Luke for a minute with his son, and demanded to know who that man had been.  Jason didn't respond but AJ stepped in.  Alan lit into Jason and told Monica that Jason had a gun and had pulled it on him.  Monica was stunned, but she managed to calmly ask him to stop.

Alan:  "I'll see you at five o'clock.  Check your inhibitions at the door."

Monica followed him outside and Alan apologized, telling her he had felt ambushed.  He told her they needed to pay attention to themselves instead of the children.  He invited her to spend the evening with him.  Too sweet!

Alan went back to GH and greeted Tony, congratulating him on his surgery.  Tony asked him about his hand, and Alan spun a story about running out of his prescription.  As Alan expected, Tony offered to call in the prescription himself.

B. Edward and Katherine

On Wednesday, Edward showed up at Katherine's door with a press release about Stefan's bad behavior.  Katherine talked him out of printing it.  Stefan wasn't going to learn any lesson from this and Nikolas would be the only one hurt.  Katherine wouldn't have it.  Edward didn't understand, but agreed, saying he would keep the press release for future possible use.  The early scenes were cute; I love Edward's flirting with her.  But the last shot after he left was a daydream of Katherine's in which she placed herself smack dab in the middle of a split between Nik and Stefan.  Ick and double ick.  It isn't about her anymore.  It's about family, and she ain't it.

C. Monica and Alan

On Thursday, Monica asked after Alan while Lila and Edward had tea.  Edward said he was outside making a call on his cell phone and hypothesized that he didn't want anyone to listen in.  Indeed, Alan was outside calling about the prescription, desperate.  He covered when Monica came outside.  She asked him about the call and about the brandy he was drinking, but she was more concerned with her own mistake at lunch.  When they went inside to Edward's snarking about indoor phones, the package arrived and Alan ripped into it without thinking.  The family noticed, but Alan covered.

Lila and Edward left and Alan threw his romantic skills into overdrive.  Very cute, if I weren't supposed to be worried about him at the same time.  He sent her upstairs to slip into "something she could easily be slipped out of" while he stayed below and took some medication.  He zoned out on the sofa, and I was afraid he would never make it upstairs.  But he did.  He just didn't make it...so to speak...once he was there.  Monica told him that they shouldn't plan things and that next time would be great.  But Alan was silent, and the look on his face was so painful to see.

VII. This Webber Triangular Thing

We had some cruddy scene between the sisters at the beginning of Wednesday's episode.  Sarah was apparently depressed about Nik's absence.  Emily showed up and ran into Sarah and they caught up a bit.  Sarah then called Nikolas; he was at the chapel.  Mush ensued and then she left school to join him as a surprise.  Nik had hurt his ankle rolling a horse (we wondered if Steve Burton had gotten Tyler back for hitting him in the head with a golf club earlier in the year).  Nik had a plan to prove Lizzy stole the test answers, and on Thursday he finally convinced Sarah to help him with it, even though it meant she'd have to lie to her sister.  He said this could be a reason for their families to not want them together...as if.  After the announcement from Sarah that she wouldn't let anybody keep them apart, she went off about cleaning up after Lizzy and agreed to the plan.

Lucky arrived, much to Lizzy's delight, and greeted Emily with a big hug, much to Lizzy's dismay.  Later, some girls started picking on Emily and Lizzy stepped in and stopped them...making sure Lucky was watching.  Yawn.  But it produced the desired effect and we were treated to a scene of Lucky gushing over her that continued on Thursday.  A teacher interrupted them and asked where Sarah was.  Afterwards, Lucky, Lizzy, and Emily worried over Sarah and Lizzy announced that she skipped out to be with Nikolas.

Lucky quizzed her about her interest in Sarah and Emily, and she flirted some more.  And he was still charmed...until Sarah arrived to split up their little pow-wow.  She told them she had found a way to prove that Nikolas stole the answers and took Liz aside to ask for her help.  She ended up talking Liz into helping her steal the next set of test answers so she could frame Nikolas and get him punished.  On Friday, Liz played concerned; Sarah played angry (with Nik).  Liz went in to the classroom and, while searching for Murty's key, let just enough slip that Sarah had her proof that Liz was the one that had stolen the test answers.

VIII. Jason and Mike

On Wednesday, the thug sat down to talk to Jason while Luke and the Qs looked on.  The thug wanted to know where Sonny had gone; he had disappeared four days earlier.  Jason told him that he *was* Sonny, as far as the thug was concerned.  He countered the threat by telling the guy to cancel the contract or the entire organization would die.  Jason was so cold and unemotional at this point that I was stunned again to see how good he could be at this job.  This was no angry, sullen kid working for Sonny.  This guy was in control.

On Thursday, Mike came to the penthouse for a picture of Sonny.  I was sad that Luke was just across the hall at Katherine's and we didn't get any interaction between him and these two.  They talked about why people kept pictures and things and why Jason didn't keep pictures.  Mike said that sometimes you needed proof that someone had been there and Jason said that Sonny had said the same thing and had taken the platter Mike had given him.  Mike asked again after Sonny and Jason refused to talk.  Mike was insistent that Jason could tell even if Sonny had told him not to, but Jason still refused.  Mike backed off and said he just wanted to be where his son had been.  Jason let him stay.

Mike:  "See, that's the part I don't understand.  He loved you like a son.  Why would he leave you to die for him?"

Jason:  "What, you think Sonny loved me like a son?  I don't.  Because from what I've seen, fathers love their son into a box."

Jason:  "He did not leave to hurt you, Mike.  And I'm not in charge because he couldn't find another way out.  I'm here because I want it and I'll stay because it's mine and that's the way it's gonna be."

Mike:  "Well, I'm glad that he found one person that he could trust.  I just wish to God it had been me."

Later, Jason came back to find Mike still there, sitting in Sonny's chair.  Mike asked him if that bothered him, and then observed that Jason clearly wasn't using the whole house and asked why.  Mike asked him how long he could keep it up, and Jason said he could do it forever.  Mike began to question Jason's ability to run the organization and why Sonny left him to do it.  Jason said it was his own choice to take over.  But he knew that what Mike was really asking was where Sonny was and was he helping Jason behind the scenes.  Mike wanted answers.  Jason said Sonny had a reason for everything, even not telling his father where he was.  And I think that the thing that bothers Mike the most is that Sonny could tell Jason.  It might have been easier for him if Sonny hadn't even let Jason know.  They parted friendly, at least, and I was glad to see that Mike wasn't blaming Jason for everything, even if he frustrated him.  Jason turned out the lights in Sonny's study and went back downstairs.

I'm always thankful for these two.  TPTB have Luke over in other things, and when these two meet it's the only time we have a calm discussion (relatively) about Sonny's departure.  And we have two versions of things that don't quite match but don't quite not match either.  And Burton and Hale are just plain good.